I try. I try to remember your touch. I would sit and rock you and you would stare at me. As the corners of your mouth turned up into a smile, you would lift your heavy arm to my face and push my cheek with your hand. I would over-exaggerate and whip my head to the right and you would laugh. Over and over again. I wonder now what a chore it might have been to make your body work that way, all so that we could laugh. It was our game, something you only did with me. You'd think I could remember how it felt. I close my eyes and I try. Just tears.
But I still feel you in my heart. I feel your laughter there. I feel your spirit there. I feel your curls there, and the depth of your eyes. How grateful I am Grey, to have even known those things, if only for a little while. How grateful I am that you were able to show me, up until nearly the very end.
I'll always feel you Grey. Always.
Forever Your Mom